Grief

"No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing ...Not that am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not "So there's no God after all", but "So this is what God's really like. Deceive yourself no longer"   C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

There's no way to prepare for deep grief, for the pain that shatters a heart and a life when a beloved leaves. No one can coach us on it. Those who could, who knew exactly how it felt, who could describe it in detail, wouldn't do it, would not presume to encroach on the most intimate part of our relationship with a loved one. Those who casually say, "Aren't you over that yet?" don't understand.

This much I will tell you about grief: If there was ever a second, or a moment, when you suspected or knew you had been betrayed at the deepest level by someone you adored, and a splintering pain began to shred your heart, turn your world grimly unbearable to the point where you would consciously choose denial and ignorance about the betrayal rather than feel this way, that is one one-millionth of what it feels like to grieve.

Grief is not abnormal condition, nor is it something to be treated with words. It is a universe, a world, unto itself. If you are called to enter this world, there in so turning back. We are not allowed to refuse that call Grief is like nothing else, with the possible exception of the pounding of waves of the ocean. To two are the same. And each one washes away the old, and washes in the new.

Gradually, almost imperceptibly, whether we believe it or not, we are being transformed.

Melody Beattie

Divine Order for the Divine Calling

When faith ceases to pray, it ceases to live. Faith does the impossible because  it brings God to undertake for us, and nothing is impossible with God. Prayer projects faith on God, and God on the world. Only God can move mountains, but faith and prayer move God.

"Therefore I say unto you, What things soever you desire when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you shall have them"

Think about this statement by our Lord--"Believe that you receive them, and you shall have them."  This statement describes faith which realizes, that appropriates, which takes.

Is your faith growing or declining as the years go by ? Does your faith stand strong when iniquity abounds and the love of many wax cold. Faith is the foundation of Christian character and the security of the soul. When Jesus was looking ahead knowing Peter's denial was forth coming, he cautioned him against it and said:

"Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, to sift you as wheat; but I have prayed for you, that your faith fail not"

Jesus was declaring a central truth; it was Peter's faith he was seeking to guard; for he knew that when faith is broken down, the foundations of spiritual life give way, and the entire structure of our walk with Him falls. It was Peter's faith which needed guarding. Jesus was seeking to fortify Peter's faith by his own personal prayer and intercession.

Later on after his failure and maturing the  Apostle Peter writes about the importance if faith and prayer:

"And besides this giving diligence, and to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; and to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness"

Peter does not encourage his readers to add works or gifts or virtues but faith. There is a divine order, of which Peter had come to know. He had come to know that every step of his divine calling required earnest prayer.

The faith which creates powerful praying is the faith which centers itself on a powerful person. Faith in Christ's ability to do and to do greatly, is the faith which prays greatly.

Discouraged ?

"...David encouraged himself in the Lord his God" 
 I Samuel 30:6

The  word of the Lord found in I Samuel is a example for those of us who are discouraged. The first action is to lay discouragement aside as a tattered garment which is to be cast off and discarded.

The discouragement that has kept you down, that has submerged you, that has kept you down trodden and robbed you of the confidence must be addressed at once in order to be free and allow you to face the future.

Discouragement does not come from the Lord and He has not permitted me.

Discouragement typically comes because in our reasoning's we have rationalized the answers to our problems--and leaned on our own understanding. We have maneuvered and manipulated with self-effort, and by taking things into our own hands and developing your own plans we actually prolong our discouragement.

These are not the Lord's plans, they are ours. These are not the Lord's idea's, they are ours.

When we rely on our own strength and understanding our plans fail to materialize, and they result in weariness , striving , struggling in our own human energy which fails to produce achievement and fulfillment  that we desired.

Rather than admit that our plans have failed  to produce the wisdom and guidance that we had hoped we keep striving only to experience a wave of bewilderment and discouragement that sets us back even further.

It's time to return to the Lord. It's time to look to the Lord for His Presence. By His word and by His Spirit we will recieve comfort from His presence when we call out in humility and faith. The Lord will hear and  release a gift of faith in our hearts to believe for the impossible.

The Lord longs to bring us forth in triumph, rejoicing in His ability to take our humility and faith, and bring us into victory. With His help we will be lifted out of discouragement and hopelessness into victory and fulfillment. "Not by power nor by might, but by My Spirit..."

"Why are thou cast down, O my Soul?...hope thou in God" Psalms 42:5

Messages

Try harder. Do better. Be perfect.

These messages are tricks that people have played on us. No matter how hard we try, we think we have to do better. Perfection always  eludes us an keeps us unhappy  with the good we've done.

Messages of perfectionism are tricks because we can never achieve their goal.  We cannot feel good about ourselves or what we have while these messages are driving us. We will never be good enough until we change the messages and tell ourselves we are good enough because of Christ.

We can start approving of and accepting ourselves and embrace with honor what God has gifted within us. When we do this we began to understand that who we are is good enough. Our best yesterday was enough; our  best today is plenty good too. We are loved and accepted by Him not by works or perfection but by grace.

We can be who we are, and do it the way we do it-today. That is the essence of avoiding perfection trap.

There are times ...

There are times, when it seems God will not  lift the darkness from you, but trust Him. God will appear like an unkind friend, but He is not; He will appear like an unnatural Father, but He is not; He will appear like an unjust judge, but He is not.

Keep the resolve of the mind of God behind all things strong and growing. Nothing happens in any aspect of life without God's knowledge, therefore you can rest in perfect confidence in Him. The Apostle Paul demonstrated this resolve in:


 II Corinthians 12:8-9
" Three times I called upon the Lord and besought Him about this and begged that it  might depart from me; But He said to me, my grace (My favor and loving-kindness and mercy) is enough for you (sufficient against any danger and enables you to bear the trouble manfully); for My strength and power are made perfect (fulfilled and completed) and show themselves most effective in your weaknesses and infirmities, that the strength and power of Christ (the Messiah) may rest (yes, may pitch a tent over and dwell) upon me! "   Amplified Bible

Prayer is not only asking, but an attitude of mind which produces the atmosphere in which asking is perfectly natural. "Ask, and it shall'' be given you".

Releasing Fear and Moving Forward

Sometimes, we say we want to go the next level in our lives--in work, in play, or in a relationship. But it feels like the door is shut. Fear can disguise itself behind many different faces; we want to do it our way; we're not interested ; or it's just not time.What we're coming up against  isn't a closed door, it's the fear we're repressing and holding inside.

If you're confused about why you're not moving forward naturally in some area of your life, take a closer look. See if you've got some hidden fears that might be holding you back. If you're blocked and trying to move forward, remember to feel and release your fear first. Then see if that wasn't just the key you needed to unlock and open that door.

Trouble Part 2

Nearly all of Paul's troubles arose from wicked and unreasonable men. Read the story as he gives it in 2 Corinthians 11:23-33.

Some troubles are Satanic in origin. Most all of Job's troubles were the result of the devil's scheme to break down Job's integrity, to make him charge God foolishly and to curse God. Job did not do so. Hear him in these familiar words. "The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord".

If trouble fails in its mission, it is either because of prayerlessness or unbelief, or both. Being in harmony with God in the dispensations of his providence, always, makes trouble a blessing.

All things are under divine control. Trouble is neither above God nor beyond his control. The Bible says it this way, "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God and are called according to his purpose".

The psalmist tells us: "Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me." Prayer recognizes God in the day of trouble and is confident in his power to deliver.

Trouble brings the strong man low, it reveals our weakness, and it brings an sense of helplessness. Blessed is he who knows how to turn to God in the time of trouble and pray. The good or evil of trouble is always determined by the spirit in which it is received. Trouble will either prove to be a blessing or a curse, it will either soften or harden us, it will draw us close to God or drive us away from him. May it drive you to him today.

"This poor man cried and the Lord heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles"

~Inspired by "E.M. Bounds on Prayer"

Trouble Part 1

Trouble and prayer are closely related. Prayer is of great value to trouble. Trouble often drives men to God in prayer, while prayer is but the voice of men in trouble. Prayer often delivers out of trouble, ministers comfort in trouble, and more often gives strength to bear trouble. Failing to pray in trouble forfeits wisdom and strength available from God.

Trouble is a present state of man on earth. "Man that is born of a woman is of few days and full of trouble". Trouble is common to man. "There hath no temptation taken you but such is common to man".

A false view of life expects nothing but sunshine and looks for ease, pleasure and comfort. When we maintain this view we live a sad and disappointed life and frequently surprised when trouble breaks into our lives.

Trouble is God's servant, doing his will unless he is defeated in the execution of that will. Trouble is under the control of Almighty God, and one of his most efficient agents in fulfilling his purposes in the perfecting his saints.

God's hand is in every trouble which breaks into our lives. Not that he directly and arbitrarily orders trouble nor is he personally responsible for the painful and afflicting warfare of our lives. But no trouble is ever turned loose in the world and comes into the life of a saint or sinner, but comes with divine permission, and is allowed to exist and do its painful work with the opportunity to carry out God's gracious designs of redemption.

Some troubles are human in their origin. They arise from second causes. They originate with others and we are the sufferers. This is a world where often the innocent suffer the consequences of the acts of others. Who has not suffered at the hands of others?

To Be Continued ~

Understanding

Our understanding of God may have been shaped by early religious experiences or the beliefs of those around us. We may wonder if God is as shaming and frightening as people can be. We may feel as victimized or abandoned by God as we have by people from our past.

Trying to understand it all can boggle our mind because of what we learned our experienced so far in life. However, we can learn to trust God anyway.

As I have grown and changed, my understanding of God has not changed on an intellectual level but has come from what I have experienced when I have surrendered my life and my will to His care.

God is real. Loving. Good. Caring. God wants to give us all the good we can handle. The more we turn our mind and heart toward a positive understanding of God , the more God validates us.

The more we thank God for who He is, who we are, and who He is in us, and the exact nature of our present circumstances, the more God acts in our behalf.

God has always planned to act in our behalf !

God is our Creator, Benefactor, and Source. God has shown me, beyond all else, that how I come to understand Him is not nearly as important as knowing that He understands me.

An Everlasting Covenant

"Nevertheless I will remember My covenant with you in the days of your youth, and I will establish an everlasting covenant with you. Then you will remember your ways and be ashamed, when you receive your older and your younger sister ; for I will give them to you for daughters, but not because of My covenant with you. And I will establish My covenant with you. Then you shall know that I am the Lord, that you may remember and be ashamed, and never open your mouth anymore because of your shame, when I provide you an atonement for all you have done, says the Lord God." Ezekiel 16:60-63

Ashamed: means to be shamed, disappointed, or embarrassed. This is alsoone of the derivatives (shame) which refers to an idol. The idol itself was considered a shame or an embarrassment. An idol also guaranteed that its worshippers would eventually be shamed and greatly disappointed in their choice of an an object of worship.

This word is used here to describe the sense of disappointment one experiences when one's hope fails in an embarrassing way; but those who trust in the Lord shall never be ashamed (Ps. 25:2,3 ; Joel 2:26,27).

This reference to being ashamed is the result of remembering the path we walked before coming into God's covenant and realizing that our deeds necessitated the atonement.

What If ?

I was talking to a friend one day about something I planned to do. Actually, I was worrying about how one particular person might react to what I intended to do.

"What if she doesn't handle it very well?" I asked.

"Then", my friend replied, "you're going to have to handle it well."

"What if''s" can make us crazy. They put control over our life in someone else's hands."What if's" are a sign that we have reverted to thinking that people have to react in a particular way for us to continue on our course.

"What if"s" are also a clue that we may wondering whether we can trust ourselves and God to do what's best for us. These are shreds of codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, and they signal fear.

The reactions , feelings , likes or dislikes of others don't have to control our behaviors, feelings, and direction. We don't need to control how others react to our choices. We can trust ourselves, with the help from God, to handle any outcome-even the most uncomfortable. And , my friend, we can trust ourselves to handle it well by the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ.

The Pursuit of Perfection

Stop expecting perfection from yourself and those around you.

We do a terrible, annoying thing to ourselves and others when we expect perfection. We set up a situation where others, including ourselves, do not feel comfortable with us. Sometimes, expecting perfection makes people so uptight that they and we make more mistakes than normal because we are so nervous and focused on mistakes.

That does not mean we allow inappropriate behaviors with the excuse that "nobody's perfect". That doesn't mean we don't have boundaries and reasonable expectations of people and ourselves.

But our expectations need to be reasonable. Expecting perfection is not reasonable.

People make mistakes. The less anxious, intimidated, and repressed they are by expectations of being perfect, the better they will do.

Striving for excellence, purity in creativity, a harmonious performance, and the best we have to offer does not happen in the stymied, negative, fear-producing atmosphere of expecting perfection.

Have and set boundaries. Have reasonable expectations. Strive to do your best. Encourage others to do the same. But know that we and others will make mistakes. Know that we and others will have learning experiences, things we go through.

Sometimes, the flaws and imperfections in ourselves determine our uniqueness, the way they do in a piece of art. Relish them. Laugh at them. Embrace them, and ourselves.

Encourage others and ourselves to do the best we can. Love and nurture ourselves and others for being who we are.

Personal Resurrection

"Then you, My people, will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them" Ezekiel 37:13

Then most remarkable of all changes a person can undergo is the change from death to life.
How well do I remember lying in the valley of dry bones. Blessed is that day when Sovereign Grace sent a messenger to prophesy over me. There was stirring within, and the creating God breathed life into my spirit. Truly it can be said of me: this my son was dead, and he is alive again.

Clarity

Greetings friends, I have managed to make my way back to my blog after a long absence. It has been quite a ride since we last communicated. I will not bore you with the details of my absence or tribulations other than to say "life happens...". Yes life happens and most commonly with and through those that are closest to you.

Apostle James tells us to ask for wisdom when we encounter life's tribulations. Yes wisdom is what we need. Wisdom in our relationships especially with the ones that are generally trusted and have more information about you and that are closest to you. Due to the lack of wisdom and unsanctified grace in our relationships we often discover the sad situation of false friends and true enemies. (see Psalms 55:12-14)

The bible says wisdom helps bring understanding that leads us to trust in Him. And through trust in Christ and the embracing of suffering and forgiveness in difficult times we can experience the great comfort of the Holy Spirit and clarity in our soul.


"I know better than to not trust God. But sometimes , I forget that"

When we are in the midst of an experience , it is easy to forget that there is a Plan. Sometimes, all we can see is today. If we were to watch only two minutes of the middle of a television program, it would make little sense. It would be a disconnected event.

If we were to watch a weaver sewing a tapestry for only a few moments, and focused on only a small piece of the work, it would not look beautiful. It would look like a few peculiar threads randomly placed.

How often we use that same, limited perspective to look at our life--especially when we are going through a difficult time.

We can learn to have perspective when we are going through those confusing, difficult learning times. When we are being pelleted by events that make us feel, think, and question, we are in the midst of learning something important.

We can trust that something valuable is being worked out in us--even when things are difficult, even when we cannot get our bearings. Insight and clarity do not come until we have mastered our lesson and wisdom and faith has come.

Faith is like a muscle. It must be exercised to grow strong. Repeated experiences of having to trust what we can't see and repeated experiences of learning to trust that things will work out, are what makes our faith muscles grow strong. With that strength clarity comes.